


The Moment When

by minikawa



Category: Narcos (TV)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Memories, Steve being Steve, im incredibly cheesy in this house tonight, javi being unconditionally and irrevocably in love with steve, steve also being indescribably in love with javi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-16 07:47:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29572716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minikawa/pseuds/minikawa
Summary: Javier Peña had an excellent memory...After all, he needed it if he was going to utilize such important information if they were going to catch Escobar, or any other of his crew. He had to keep his mind sharp, staying on top of all of the names, locations, and anything else that his informants had provided him with. His sharp memory was handy in the mundane things of life as well: car keys, appointments, birthdays, the names of his girls down at the brothel—he didn’t forget a thing.But for the life of him, Javier couldn’t remember when exactly did he fall in love with Steve Murphy.
Relationships: Steve Murphy/Javier Peña
Comments: 20
Kudos: 39





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hello again my friends! just a few notes about the process of this fic: 
> 
> -i have been once again been inspired by another one of ur guys' fics! (seriously, yall make some awesome delicious content <33). The wall scene in here was inspired by claveldelaire's awesome fic "Nunca estoy diciendo besos nada más". I love the way the writer captures the intimacy and tension between steve and javi. guys, go give it a read, its great!! ^_^
> 
> -pls enjoy!

Javier Peña had an excellent memory. His colleagues used to tease him for his habit of hastily scrawling down notes during meetings or briefings when they knew fully well that the information would just imprint itself into his memory bank. After all, he needed it if he was going to utilize such important information if they were going to catch Escobar, or any other of his crew. He had to keep his mind sharp, staying on top of all of the names, locations, and anything else that his informants had provided him with. His sharp memory was handy in the mundane things of life as well: car keys, appointments, birthdays, the names of his girls down at the brothel—he didn’t forget a thing. 

But for the life of him, Javier couldn’t remember the exact moment he knew he was in love with Steve Murphy. 

Maybe it was the day they met? From the moment Javier saw Steve walk up to him in the parking lot, it didn’t escape him that his new partner was attractive. _Very_ attractive. He was tall and sturdy, and he held himself up with a self assured swagger that would have looked overly cocky on anyone else, but looked charming on him. His golden hair was neatly styled and trimmed, with a moustache to match. What struck Javier most of all were his eyes. As soon as Steve removed his sunglasses, Javier almost lost himself in the brilliant blue of his new partner’s eyes. They had a unique spark, experienced yet young at heart. 

Perhaps love at first sight did exist. But, wait...that wasn’t quite it...maybe…

Maybe it was on one of their missions together? They have been partners for a couple of years now, and within those years they fought side by side, hunting down drug lords and criminals through the streets of Medellin. No matter how many raids they’ve done together, they were both assured that they had each other’s back. On one particular mission, Javier had found himself racing through the streets in hot pursuit of one of Escobar’s men. No matter which alleyway or corner he turned, the man had eluded him, leaving Javier swearing in an exhausted string of both English and Spanish, unaware of the presence behind him- 

Steve had knocked the perp out cold before the latter could pull out his gun. Javer had whirled around to see his target sprawled on the ground, with Steve standing over him, heaving and sweating from the pursuit.

“Dammit, Jav!” Steve sighed in exaggerated exasperation. “He almost had you! If I weren’t there…” he trailed off, the worry slipping in his gaze. He shook his head. “Are you okay?”

Once again, Javier would never forget Steve’s eyes in that moment, glinting with concern and worry over his safety. Once again, Steve had saved his life. His hero. Javier couldn’t deny that fluttery feeling in his chest that day. 

Hang on. That wasn’t quite it, either. Even before then, he would get that fluttery feeling Steve did, well, _anything._

But there was one time when that feeling was more than just a flutter. 

The day Steve returned safely from the clutches of the Cali cartel. After days of searching and worrying and fighting off thoughts of the worst, Javier had never been so glad to see him...even if Steve did shove him up against a wall.

Javier couldn’t blame Steve for being pissed. To this day, he would always carry the guilt of nearly endangering his partner’s life. The confrontation was brief, yet intense as Steve had grabbed him by the shirt, shoving his face close to his own. Javier couldn’t remember a time when their faces had been this close before...close enough to catch the faint scent of cologne and sweat, close enough to count the faded freckles across Steve’s nose, close enough to lean in and ki-

They were all reminders that Steve had returned, he was home alive and safe. Even in the heat of the confrontation, Javier was overwhelmed with relief...and something else that nearly drowned his heart, something that left him gasping for breath-

“Jav!”

Javier blinks, snapping out of his thoughts. It takes him a moment to return to reality. He’s slumped at his desk, an array of files scattered before him. Steve is sitting across from him, an inquisitive look on his face. 

“Earth to Javier! Waaaake upppp!” Steve reaches over and pokes a finger into Javier’s cheek repeatedly. 

“Keep doing that and I’ll bite your finger off,” Javier grumbles. Steve immediately withdraws his finger, grinning cheekily. 

“Phew, you’re alive! You had me worried there for a second, you completely dozed off,” Steve says “What’s going on in that brilliant brain of yours? What’s on your mind?” 

All Javier can do is smile. _If only you knew,_ he thinks to himself. 

Even if Javier couldn’t remember the exact moment he knew he loved Steve, it didn’t matter. Because every day with Steve Murphy felt like falling in love all over again. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve reflects on his own memories with Javier, each one a reminder of how much he is loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends!! Looks like we have a part two!!
> 
> Thank you so much to Tessieivy2 for suggesting a second part in Steve's point of view! I had so much fun writing this, it's always a blast delving into their thoughts and feelings <33 
> 
> Also the later part of this chapter briefly references another fic I've written, "Falling!" 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy! Quick warning tho...this is probably the sappiest most mushiest thing I've ever written yet, I couldn't help myself x'D

“What’s going on in that brilliant brain of yours?” Steve asked, leaning across to Javier over the desk. “What’s on your mind?”

Javier blinked at him before a slow smile formed across his face, the kind of cheeky smile as if he knew a secret that Steve had no access to. 

“C’mon, Jav, spill!” Steve goaded him on. “You’re plotting something aren’t you? Doing a little shady business behind the DEA’s back? Don’t tell me you’re secretly on Escobar’s payroll or something?” His eyes narrowed in suspicion. 

Javier just laughed, shaking his head before returning to his work. Steve pouted, huffing as he slumped back in his chair, still curious about whatever the hell Javier was daydreaming about earlier.  _ You’re so weird,  _ he thought to himself, idly playing with a pencil on his desk as he watched Javier flip through paperwork. They fell back into a comfortable silence as they resumed their work, but every now and then Steve snuck a glance at his partner. He usually felt grumpy when Javier kept secrets from him, he didn’t like to be left behind. But this was different. Javier looked like he was deep in thought, but not about their work...more like he was remembering something. Something pleasant, judging by that small, fond smile.. 

Steve adored that smile, the smile that meant Javier was content and at peace. He wondered what ran across Javier’s mind to elicit such serenity and happiness. 

He wondered whether Javier thinks of him to make him smile like that. 

Steve definitely thought a lot about Javier. 

He felt like a lovesick teenager whenever he thought of his partner. Sure, it was a little silly, but it was honestly one of the only pleasant things he had felt in a long while in his grim line of work. Whenever work got too dull or dreary, or the stress became too heavy, Steve would allow himself to just sit back and think about happier memories...and many of those memories included Javier. He looked on those memories fondly, from the day they met, their first mission together, or even something as simple as a night hanging at the bar. Every moment spent together was precious, and Steve would always feel at ease reminiscing about their times together...and all the times he fell in love with him.

Speaking of which...huh, when exactly  _ did  _ he fall in love with him?

The question had him puzzled. He tapped his pencil against the desk as he rummaged through his mind, trying to find the exact memory of when he knew that he loved Javier. 

It was so strange. He could remember the moment he fell for Connie—it had instantly been love at first sight. Perhaps that was the case with Javier? Steve remembered that day well...and there was no doubt in his mind that he instantly found his partner attractive the moment he laid eyes on him: warm complection, a wave of brown hair that looked soft to the touch, keen observant eyes that looked as if they knew every one of your secrets. Javier was the definition of tall, dark, and handsome.

Hold up. Although Steve would never deny that he found him to be very handsome when they met, it didn’t feel quite right that this was the moment he had fallen in love. He had been still married to Connie then, although at that time things had become rather...complicated between them. 

Steve shook his head. He didn’t want to dwell on the things that made him sad. Instead, he shifted into another more pleasant memory with Javier. His mind instantly landed on the day he and his partner were rummaging through La Catedral, sifting through the mess left behind by Escobar and his cronies when they had escaped. They found nothing useful...except for that stupid hat Escobar had left behind. He and Javier  _ had  _ to get a picture of Javi with that dumb hat on. Steve still kept the photo in his wallet, pulling it out whenever he needed a boost of serotonin—seeing Javi in that dumb hat, with the biggest dimpled smile that made him forget that they were in the middle of a drug war, that smile that put even the bright Colombian sun to shame. 

Every time Steve looked at that picture, he fell in love all over again.

But it wasn’t only in the times of smiles and laughter that made him love Javi. In fact, his love only intensified during the times of pain. 

No matter how long they had in the fight, no matter how many battles they survived, there were still nightmares that haunted them even in the waking hours. The things they had witnessed had seeped itself into their core like poison. There was only so much a man could take before becoming undone. It wasn’t too long ago since everything felt like it was falling apart. Steve was losing everything...Connie was gone, and so was their daughter. His last mission with Carillo had left him broken and shaken to his core. In this line of work, there was no room for weakness...and yet Steve had never felt so helpless. 

He wouldn’t have gotten through had it not been for Javier. Only with Javier he felt safe enough to allow himself to be vulnerable. He remembered that night in Javi’s apartment, the very first time he cried in front of his partner. He remembered the warmth of Javier’s strong arms wrapped around him, the whispered reassurances, the tender kisses upon his head. In that moment, Steve knew that he would always have one person who understood and embraced him in his vulnerability. Javier had seen him at his weakest, and protected him and loved him. 

“Steve?”

Steve jolted at the sound of his name. He shook himself back to the present, blinking rapidly. Javier was staring at him, visibly concerned. 

“Steve? What’s wrong?”

“N-Nothing’s wrong,” Steve cleared his throat. “I’m f…” it took him a moment to realize that his eyes were slightly wet. He had no idea that he had begun tearing up from the memory. Quickly, he wiped at his eyes. “I’m fine...just c’mere for a second.”

Javier raised an eyebrow before getting up and moving toward Steve’s side of the desk. Before he could even sit down, Steve reached for his partner’s arm, pulling him down into an engulfing hug. 

“H-Hey!” Javier yelped as he found his face smushed up against Steve’s shoulder. “What gives? Are you sure you’re okay?”

Steve sniffled, pulling Javier close like a teddy bear. “Yeah. More than okay,” he pressed a kiss against his temple. “‘Cause I got you, don’t I?”

Javier sighed, relaxing into his hug. “God, you’re so sappy today...and you’re lucky that I like sappy.” He grinned teasingly, reaching up to gently pinch Steve’s cheek. 

Steve laughed, nuzzling his face against his partner’s. “Te amo,” he whispered, soft and true. 

A thousand times,  _ te amo.  _

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you guys enjoyed!! thank you for reading and please let me know what you guys think!


End file.
